Miniature Manners

Hey there! You’re listening to the Mighty Mommy with some quick and dirty tips for practical parenting. This week I’ll be sharing tips to help encourage your kids to recognize and use good manners.

I have two children and I’m proud to say that both of them are very polite … most of the time. My husband and I always try to use good manners. When we are around our friends and family, they are polite and courteous. It simply makes sense that our children would follow suit. Teaching your children to use good manners in their everyday behavior is easier than you might expect.

The first step to having polite children is to be a polite parent, friend, neighbor, or colleague. Even if you are a complete stranger, it’s best to use your good manners. I want to briefly mention that although it isn’t good to encourage your child to talk to strangers, there are certain situations where I feel a simple return greeting or “thank you” for a compliment is acceptable. I’ll be talking about stranger danger in a future episode.

Modeling good manners is the best way to teach your children how to be polite, courteous people. You should say “please” and “thank you” when speaking directly to your children. “Please hand me your cup.” “Thank you for playing so nicely with your friends today.” It is also important that you model good manners with other adults. Nobody is perfect, but we can always try to be polite. If you slip up once in a while, your kids might even start correcting you. If you don’t feel you’ve always used your best manners with people, now is a great time to change. Kids will mimic their parents’ behavior even if they don’t realize it. So, start right away.

Once your child starts displaying good manners, be sure to give recognition for the behavior. Whether she’s saying “please” and “thank you” or sharing her toys with a friend, tell her you are proud of her and appreciate that she’s being so polite. Positive reinforcement will encourage your child to continue good behavior. I often find myself saying, “Thank you for using such good manners.” My daughter generally responds by smiling and saying, “You’re welcome!” She knows she’s done a good job and she’s very proud of it.

Another helpful tip I’ve learned to help a child remember to be polite is to give her some lead-in words or ask a question. If you’ve ever been around a mom with her children for any length of time, you’ve probably heard the mom ask the child, “Now, what do you say?” The child almost always follows with either “Thank you,” or “I’m sorry.” My daughter used to apologize almost every time, but with practice, she’s figured out which response fits with each situation. We are currently working on saying, “You’re welcome,” and my daughter is very quick to let me know if I’ve neglected to respond adequately after she has thanked me.

My final tip to encourage good manners is making sure you are giving your child ample opportunities to use her learned manners. Eating out, attending play dates, and having friends over are all situations where your child can practice being polite. Greeting friends, sharing toys, excusing herself when she burps and having patience to wait for mommy or daddy to finish talking are all great times to use good manners. Thank you all for listening.

That’s it for now. I hope you’ve enjoyed the show. Also, if you haven’t already done so, please take a moment to post a review at iTunes. I’d really appreciate it.

If you would like to request a topic for the Mighty Mommy, or if you’d like to share a wonderful tip of your own, you can e-mail mommy@qdnow.com

The Mighty Mommy’s Quick and Dirty Tips for Practical Parenting is part of the Quick and Dirty Tips network at quickanddirtytips.com. This week Grammar Girl is talking about “sit” versus “set” so be sure to check out her podcast!

This is your friend the Mighty Mommy wishing you happy and fun parenting!”

Music – “Golly Gee” Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com) Licensed under Creative Commons “Attribution 2.0” https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/2.0/

Polite Girl image courtesy of Shutterstock