Office Manners, Part Deux

Are You Really Better Than Me?

There’s a tendency for some people to act as if they’re more important than other people in the office. Sometimes they rank higher on the org chart, and sometimes they just think they should; but either way, it’s not appropriate behavior. Let’s look at — hmm — Magnus, for example. Magnus seems to believe that his issues are more important than everyone else’s issues in the office. A very clear indication of this is that he interrupts conversations, even if they’re business related. What he should do is wait his turn.

There is an order to be followed in society. Breaking that order tends to cause distress and inefficiency. If Magnus realizes there won’t be a break in the conversation any time soon, he should not loiter lest he become “that guy.” Rather, if the conversation is business related, our pushy friend should move along and send an instant message or email instead. If the conversation is NOT business related, Magnus should just go back to work or perhaps look for a chance to quickly request a phone call at his co-worker’s convenience. When there is an urgent situation that needs immediate attention, Magnus is more than likely within his rights to apologize to both parties, express the urgent nature, and then give his co-worker the chance to wrap up the conversation. At the very least, these actions convey respect to the other parties and can encourage good will.

If Magnus were to physically walk in between those having the conversation and just start talking, it would make everything awkward and probably stir resentment since it is pretty clear at that point what Magnus thinks of his co-workers as people. But as difficult as it might be, lashing out at Magnus is also not the appropriate reaction. In that situation his target should take the high road by saying something like, “Excuse me. Would you mind if we finish our conversation? I’ll get with you as soon as we’re done.”

No Slobs Allowed

Now that we’ve gotten Magnus Buttinski taken care of, let’s discuss the public office spaces like the employee kitchen. Please don’t treat the employee kitchen as if it is someone else’s responsibility. There tends to be a select few co-workers who end up cleaning most of the mess for everyone else, but I don’t see anyone tipping for doing a good job.  Always clean up after yourself.  A reminder email is completely acceptable to let people know they need to clean up after themselves, but remember to be polite.  An example of an inappropriate email to send is as follows (actual email) “To the piggy who cooked lunch in the microwave, CLEAN IT UP!”  Wow, did the author of that email really think that would produce results?  There is no need to be insulting, just a quick message like this will do, “Thanks to everyone for doing such a good job keeping the kitchen clean because it improves the workplace for each of us.”

Disappearing Food

And typically everyone in an office environment is no longer in high school, so when did it become acceptable to steal? OK, so it’s not acceptable to steal in high school either, but when people are taking food out of the refrigerator that does not belong to them, it kind of reminds me of high school behavior. Two general rules should be applied to the community kitchen:

1. Leave it the way you found it.
2. Only take what is yours.

Makin’ Coffee

Another topic that touches the heart of many is the coffee maker (not a person, but the machine). This one is simple. If you are the person who pours enough coffee that there is not enough left in the pot to fill one more cup, you should take it upon yourself to start brewing a fresh pot. It is very frustrating for someone to go for a cup of coffee and find the pot empty. There are certain times of the day when it might not be worthwhile to make a fresh pot, but at that point it is appropriate to ask around to see if anyone would like some. The same thing goes for the water cooler except that many times the jug is heavy. The mannerly thing to do is replace the jug if you are the one to get the last bit of water. Guys, you can even keep an eye out and offer to help any lady who is stuck with the job. Ladies, don’t be shy about replacing that jug yourself. But don’t be shy either about asking for assistance.

It’s Too Forward to Forward

On a parting note, email chain letters should be saved for personal email, not work email. You probably receive enough work email during the day and could go without email forwards cluttering up your in-box. If someone insists on forwarding emails to you, politely request that they begin sending those emails to your home address or let them know you would rather receive a more personal email from them than a blanket forward.

This wraps up the second edition of office manners, please send in any comments or questions. I’m sure we could fill a few more of these episodes.

Thank you for listening to the Modern Manners Guy’s Quick and Dirty Tips for a More Polite Life.

And thanks to Derek Norton of The MannersCast for guest-writing this episode. You can hear more from Derek and the rest of The MannersCast at https://www.mannerscast.com.

Transcripts of this show can be found online at manners.quickanddirtytips.com.

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