Public Restroom Questions Answered

Hey there! You’re listening to the Mighty Mommy with some quick and dirty tips for practical parenting.

Listener Michael writes

How should opposite gender parents handle it when young children need to use the bathroom? Is it permissible for a man to go into the women’s room with his young daughter to help her go to the bathroom? My wife says it’s okay for men to go into the women’s room if they’re helping their daughter.

Well, Michael, the quick and dirty tip is that you’ve gotta do what you’ve gotta do! If that means going where few men have gone before, then so be it. You do need to follow some simple protocols, of course.

My first suggestion is to check if there is a family restroom available. Many large chains and department stores now have family restrooms. These are nice because instead of having stalls, they are single rooms with locking doors. Family restrooms are gender neutral which makes them friendly for all members of the family.

If a family restroom isn’t available and you have a child who isn’t particular about which restroom she uses, then your best option is to take your child into the restroom which you’d normally use yourself. Most moms are accustomed to taking their sons into the ladies’ room. I take my son into the ladies’ room with me and I will continue to do so until he’s old enough to go into the men’s room without me. Girls, however, are another story.

When my daughter needs to use the restroom while we are out, she needs to use it as quickly as possible. This is usually the case with younger children. Asking them to “just hold it” doesn’t work for long. My daughter refuses to go to the men’s room with her dad. She is very insistent that she use the ladies’ room. Even if your daughter is willing to go into the men’s room with you, there are still a few obstacles. Men’s rooms are significantly different in design. If you don’t want your daughter to get an eyeful, you should check to be sure none of the urinals are in use before entering with her. A simple peek around into the bathroom should let you know if you have a clear path to a private stall. Then, when your daughter has finished her business, simply check again before taking her out of the stall. Hopefully anyone entering the bathroom while your daughter is washing her hands will be courteous enough to either use a private stall or wait until you leave.

Now, if your daughter is like mine and won’t go into the men’s room, it’s hardly worth the fight when there is a perfectly good ladies’ room available. I recommend that the dad alert the ladies present that he needs to bring his daughter into the restroom. Use a polite comment such as, “I need to bring my daughter into the restroom if there are no objections.” It’s doubtful that anyone will object, but if they do, let them know that you have a young lady who needs to use the bathroom as quickly as possible. Then you can ask your child to wait or suggest the men’s room again. Ladies’ rooms are outfitted with private stalls so, unless someone has suddenly decided to use the public part of the restroom as a locker room, you really shouldn’t run into any issues.

Finally, I have learned that by keeping a port-a-potty in my car I always have a place for my kids to go to the bathroom whenever the urge is upon them. After my daughter was done with her potty training on the little potty, I kept it and put it in the car. It’s come in quite handy for … well, for everyone involved.

That’s it for now. Thank you for listening.

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This is your friend the Mighty Mommy wishing you happy and fun parenting!

Public Restroom image courtesy of Shutterstock