5 Worst Super Bowl Party Guests
A Super Bowl party is a time for good food, good friends, and a rockin’ good time. And unless your team is in the game, it’s usually a stress-free night. But these 5 bad guests can sour any Super Bowl party. Are you one of them? Find out.
Are you ready for some football?!
I for one love everything about the Super Bowl; the game itself, the commercials, the 24-hour, around-the-clock coverage before the kickoff even happens, and of course the party. Super Bowl gatherings are like no other event you’ll attend all year. A Super Bowl party is not a fancy soiree – it’s all about fun. It doesn’t matter if you even like football, or if your team is playing - a Super Bowl party is a time for good food, good friends and family, and a rockin’ good time. And unless your team is in the game, it’s usually a stress-free night.
However, there are some party guests who can make our tempers boil like the spicy chili your neighbor brought over. So before you paint your face and grab your lucky jersey, check out my top 3 Quick and Dirty Tips for how not to get disinvited to next year’s Super Bowl party.
Bad Guest #1: The Pessimist. During every Super Bowl party there is one person who sees every fumble, missed catch, or sacked quarterback as the end of the game…even if it’s only the first quarter. Welcome to the party, Mr./Mrs. Pessimist! The Pessimist is one of the louder participants in the party, but their contributions are always doom and gloom. "I can’t believe my team lost the coin toss! That’s it, the game is over.”
The big game is a time for optimism and last minute plays - not a time to whine and act like the game is over because someone dropped a handoff. If you are truly a pessimist, save the drama for your internal battles. Don’t unleash your negativity on the rest of the group who are simply trying to enjoy the evening.
Bad Guest #2: The Couch Coach. I had football coaches all through high school, but in all my 34 years of attending Super Bowl parties did I ever hang out with a real life NFL coach. Oddly, it seems many part time coaches come out of the woodwork come Super Bowl party time. It seems that the Couch Coach, sitting next to you covered in nachos and cheese dip, happens to know all the right plays that should have been called…but the teams forgot to dial him in for a consult. Shocking, right?
In reality the Couch Coach knows nothing. He's just some blowhard with an ego the size the MetLife Stadium. In fact, the Couch Coach tends to be the worst athlete in the room and couldn’t catch a toss from a toddler, let alone show Peyton how to throw a spiral.
Bad Guest #3: The Madman. "Whoa, settle down there, buddy!" This is what you’ll be thinking when the resident Madman erupts after every bad play. The Super Bowl Madman is the evil step-sibling to the Couch Coach. He, too, knows about everything on the field...after it happens of course. The difference between the two is that unlike the Couch Coach, the Madman is filled with rage! He screams, shouts and stomps his feet in frustration over every single bad call or missed catch. “Tackle him!...Get him!...Throw the dang ball!.. Oh come on, where’s the flag?!”
If you find one of these characters at the party, try to covertly whisper to them that they need to settle down. And if they do not, step far away from the Madman and remove all fragile objects they can potentially hurl against the wall.
Bad Guest #4: Mr./Mrs. Rewind That, Please. Technology is a wonderful thing…until it gets annoying. The rewind feature on many televisions equipped with DVR or TiVo allows any play to be seen over an over again. It’s great to do once or twice but let’s face it, you’re not a referee. So if you constantly ask to “Rewind that please, I want to see that play again,” you’re going to stall the momentum of the game and bother everyone.
It also shows a lack of respect for others who are there to simply watch the game in real time. As well, what does it matter to you? Are the referees calling you to review the play? No, I don’t think so. Let the refs do their job, while you get back to your pizza bagels and mozzarella sticks.
Bad Guest #5: The TV Blocker. This person is usually innocent -- just careless. Sometimes it's a child who happens to hop in front of the TV (which is understandable) but usually it's some goofball who walks in front of the TV during a crucial play. Their timing is amazing. Right as the big catch is about to happen, cousin Steve stands up to take a call, blocking all the action. There are rules to attending a Super Bowl party, Steve, and one of the most important is, “Down in front!”
If you are the person who happens to block a major play, you will surely feel the wrath of your fellow guests. Thankfully, Mr./Mrs. Rewind is there for the save, but still, that won't stop the yelling.
Do you have any more bad Super Bowl party guests to add to the list? Post them below in comments. I’d love to hear from you.
As always, if you have a manners question, drop me a line at firstname.lastname@example.org. Follow me on Twitter @MannersQDT, and of course, check back next week for more Modern Manners Guy tips for a more polite life.
Do you have any recent graduates in your circle, or someone looking to start a new career? Check out my book, Reply All…And Other Ways to Tank Your Career for great tips and advice on job success. It's available now!